I have been watching HBO’S “The Outsider” which stars Ben Mendelsohn

who was fantastically awesome in “Bloodline” on Netflix

If you haven’t watched it I highly recommend it.

And “The Outsider” also stars Jason Bateman

Who I think is a very under rated actor.

He does such a good job and he has stared in so many movies in small parts.

I watch “Ozark” too on Netflix and he does such a great job.

This guy really just can do it all and no one really gives him any credit.

He is like the guy next door.

Always there but never really stands out.

I recommend “The Outsider” too to anyone who is looking for something interesting to watch.

 

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My youngest daughter is on the mend and gets to go home today

Not even 48 hours after having brain surgery she gets to join the world again

It speaks volumes of how far medicine has come

We are so very fortunate to have a hospital so close with amazing doctors and nurses

We are blessed

I wrote a blog about friends last night at work and it is no where to be found on this blog.
how strange.
Where could it have gone to?

Boggles the mind how things get thrown in cyberspace and never find their way to whomever it was meant to go to.

Ahh………

After having two exceptional days over the weekend, high fifties low sixties, they are predicting snow again.
Up to six inches.

And while I know we live in Iowa and it is only February 24th, I sure wish it wouldn’t snow.

And I know most people feel the same way.

Sigh

I have very few friends

I can count them on one hand

2 are work friends and one is someone I worked with 20 plus years ago and have been friends with off and on all these years

We don’t have a lot in common

She is married but has never had kids, or grandchildren

But it is nice to talk every now and then

A friend is hard to come by in my opinion

I have had friends who only want to talk about themselves and their problems and don’t really care if i have problems

That is not a friend in my book

I know people who say they have lots of friends and I can’t help but wonder what their definition of a friend is compared to mine?

Maybe I am too picky?

I spent the majority of my day with my 18 month old grand daughter.
it was pure delight.
I haven’t seen her since Sunday and it was so very wonderful to have some time with her.

She is starting to talk more and she is so funny and smart.
She along with the other five bring me such joy.

Being Nana is one of the most wonderful things I have in my life.
They truly are my gifts from God.

🙂

Well it has been four hours since I blogged last.

In that time, I showered, dyed my hair (Same color but it was very dull looking so I spruced it up with dying it)

Went to Iowa City to get some groceries, ate lunch at a Mexican restaurant and now I am home again, back in my pajamas, after taking some sleeping aide, in hopes that I can sleep the next seven or eight hours.

I need it.

I am tired.

No not as tired as I feel like I should be, but tired none the less.

I hope the sleeping aide works well.

In the last 48 hours I have gotten six hours of sleep

I need much more than that, hence the sleeping aide.

Have tonight and tomorrow night yet to work before I get a night off.

Sigh.

Wish me luck

🙂

 

So I have worked third shift the last two nights and when I get home and try to sleep, I can’t.

Yesterday I got five hours, I came home ninety minutes ago and slept an hour and now I am awake again and can’t sleep.

Good Lord this is frustrating.

I need to buy some over the counter sleeping pills  so hopefully I can drug myself enough to get eight hours later today.

Sigh

I work tonight and tomorrow night yet so I must get some sleep to function.

Sigh……

I know I am not alone in those who wish it was spring and not still winter.

It is so hard to find happiness when one is stuck inside and can’t get out to exercise or work in the yard.

Yeah I know, it is the same every year but this year I am looking forward to spring more.

Mainly due to grandchildren needing to get outside and to be able to run around.

I of course can’t wait either.

 

It is eleven thirty pm on this Saturday night.
The house is quiet.
All are sleeping except me of course.
I think my body has gotten so use to being up all night from working third shift that I find it hard to sleep when I am off.

But alas…..I work the next four nights after tonight so…..

This is my big week.
I work six out of the seven days this week.

I hate the long week but I think working is good for me so I enjoy it and know I feel better physically when I am working.

There was a lot of bumming on these few days off.

I can even admit to being bored a time or two.

NOT because there wasn’t things to do but more that the things I could have done or should have done, didn’t appeal to me.

I want to be outside.

Today was decent, about 35 degrees warm enough to wash all the gunk off of my car.

It is nice and clean again.

But not warm enough to be out working in the yard.

 

Had Brian’s little birthday dinner.

Which was nice.

The only one missing was Paula but she will be here next weekend and they will all get together then.
I probably won’t join them as I will have to work both Friday and Saturday nights and will need sleep before I go to work.

But we shall see.

Maybe I can get away with not sleeping before I go in on Saturday night.

The five younger grandchildren are here all sleeping around me.

🙂

Anyway they are having a little party of sorts, next Sunday when Emily gets her hair shaved off.

Her hair dresser suggested they do a big deal about it with friends and her kids if she wants.

Paula will go and I will probably too.
Just to take pictures and have them for her to remeember the occasion by.

I think shaving her head for surgery is going to be a pretty big deal for Emily.

I am quite sure she hasn’t let the full impact of all of this hit her just yet.

But once her head is shaven, it will.

 

I suggested she buy a wig but she thinks they are too expensive but I will help pay for one if that is something she decides to do later on.

It is hard to say how long it will take her to grow a full head of hair back.

Adam bless his heart, it going to shave his head too just so that they can go through it together.

Ten days from today is her surgery.
Actually ten days from today she will be out of surgery and in ICU for the night and God willing it will all be well and she will do fine.

I won’t lie, I am a bit worried but I know I have to put it in God’s hands and He will do what He thinks is best.

I hope and pray He believes Emily is needed to see her children to adults.

I can’t imagine a life without her in it and I don’t ever want to.

I never want to outlive any of my children or grandchildren.

I don’t know that I could do it.

Oh deep down I know I could, I just don’t want to.

And God willing I will never have to.

 

My aunt Loretta became a horrible alcoholic when she lost her son Jerry in 1974

Who died at twenty one from getting hit by a truck when he was on his motorcycle.
And then eleven years later one of her daughters was murdered by a man who she had been dating but broke up with.

And then she lost a daughter to cancer, 2 actually and another son to a heart attack.

All before my aunt passed from this earth.

It would be horrific to have to survive losing a child, not to mention her losing five of the ten she had.

I hope I never have to endure that.
And God willing I won’t.

 

Anyway I don’t mean to be morbid or think of death or even write about it.

It is just on my mind with Emily and I hope it will all be fine.

My life is pretty damn good just the way it is and honestly I don’t want any of it to change.

Sure I could have more money and be thinner as I always say.

But both are a work in progress.

I am a very blessed woman and I know it.