When I look into your eyes I still get weak

And when I’m this close to you I just can’t speak

You are all I want and all I need and it’s so damn hard to believe, that’s you without me~

This is a few lines from a song that is stuck in my head.

It has and always will be  near and dear to my heart as I loved a man who didn’t love me enough to want to spend the rest of his life with me.

I don’t see him often.

Last year I saw him three times.

I haven’t seen him this year yet.

We don’t talk because when we did he always implied he was up for an affair, and I am trying very hard to be better than that.

It will always be a struggle where he is concerned.

I loved him very much and always will.

I KNOW I have a better man in my husband.

I do know that.

But it doesn’t change and will never change how I feel about the other one.

Yep, that’s you without me~

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