Archive for July 16, 2018

Gabe   1 comment

Another blog that never got published.

Sigh

 

My daughters dog Gabe passed away

I just learned of it today.

It seems he passed on February 21st.

He was full of cancer.

My daughter Paula isn’t doing very well with it

Gabe was like her child.

He was a great dog

And she was great with him.

Paula and Gabe 2016

Posted July 16, 2018 by Marge in family, heartfelt, my loves, ramblings

Some Thoughts~   Leave a comment

The other day I was going through some things and found a note I wrote to my husband a few years ago.

I never gave him the letter although I do remember at the time really wanting to.

It was about how unhappy I am living in a loveless marriage with a man who really doesn’t see me let alone even act like he loves me.

He shows me no affection what so ever and I find a huge emptiness inside of me because of it.

Don’t get me wrong, I no longer show him any affection either due to being turned down and basically ignored for years.

Five to be exact.

The last time he turned me down was on my birthday five years ago.

And I decided right there and then that I was never going to ask him to show me any kind of affection again.

I was done asking for something that I feel I should never have had to ask for to begin with.

We are married for crying out loud.

I shouldn’t have to keep asking or beg to be paid attention to.

I feel alone, and lonely 99% of the time and while I am not so eager to run out and have sex with someone….It would be nice to be seen and acknowledged.

I know marriages wan.  I know it can’t be sunshine and roses all of the time.

I do know that.

But affection now and then, or even a touch would be so nice…..

And while some may think…..if I just show affection first and make things….more approachable……I could turn it around.

But I have tried.

He just doesn’t care enough…..

Maybe this is the way every marriage goes…… I don’t know…..I have no one to ask.

My mother was married five times and divorced five times.

My grandmother out lived three husbands and she is no longer here to ask.

The only other person I am close enough to ask is my younger sister.  And she has her own woes with her own marriage.

My friend Laurie is in the same boat with her marriage.

It stinks and is quite sad……to have loved and been so loved so deeply and now to have nothing.

Some times my heart aches…..

quotes-to-live-by

 

 

 

Posted July 16, 2018 by Marge in heartfelt, ramblings

My Thought For The Day~   Leave a comment

sometimes

Posted July 16, 2018 by Marge in heartfelt, ramblings, Uncategorized

The Working Class And My Little People~   Leave a comment

As usual I worked the weekend.

It is something I do every weekend to get to have my days off during the week to watch grandchildren.

I always look forward to Monday because I am off

I use to hate Monday’s but that was when I only worked Monday through Friday.

I did tell my boss that she could put me on a few nights a week if she needed due to two people just up and quitting and us being short employee wise.

Sigh.

I would love to never work again but my pocket book doesn’t agree with that so alas…..I work.

Right now I am sitting here trying to be quiet as my grandson Aaron and his sister Bailey stayed over night last night and both are still sleeping.

Aaron loves to stay over night.

Not sure why other than it is something different than being at home.

I have a meeting at two today at work and Aaron wants to tag along.

I keep telling him he will be bored but he says he doesn’t care.

I think his grandfather scares him a bit.

Rick can be gruff and has little patience.

Yes Aaron is ornery and rambunctious but he is a happy healthy boy.

I think he should be cut some slack.

But Rick and my daughter tend to think Aaron picks on Bailey and makes her fuss.

I think it is more…..Aaron is being a brother and Bailey needs to toughen up.

Ahh well……

It is that time of year again when the stores are filled with school supplies.

Yes school starts in over a month but every year we buy the kids school supplies and sometimes I take them shopping for clothes.

Usually I just do the clothes shopping for Keira and Kayla and I just give the parents money for Mirielle, Aaron and Bailey.

Bailey will be starting preschool so I am not sure how much she will actually need for school supplies…..or any new clothes…..

I am grateful for my grandchildren and helping out a bit with school makes me happy and it helps ease the parents load.

I am a blessed woman.

Happy Thanksgiving

 

 

Posted July 16, 2018 by Marge in Aaron, Bailey, family, God, heartfelt, Kayla, Keira, Mirielle, my loves, ramblings