if I had to choose one place or the other, I would probably pick a home near the mountains.
Although I go to the beach much more than I do the mountains

I know, weird.

not that I will probably ever live anywhere but in Iowa.
Still having a home on the beach and in the mountains would be incredibly cool.
🙂

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there is just something about water that I love

I love the mountains too, but for some reason water calls to me.

I tend to gravitate to it.

this is me
I am definitely chicken

already I am second guessing the thought of going back to school

I just do not have the confidence to put myself out there.

to risk failing.

I want to.

but I am scared.
I want someone to hold my hand and help me should I fall flat on my face

yes it is true

I am a chicken sh__

😦

commitment.

this says it all.

 

😦

I hate the humidity Iowa tends to pour out at any given moment

take today, it is quite humid out there.

They had the doors open a bit ago for the kids to come into the school and I can tell in the hallways that it is a bit humid.
I took the trash out after breakfast and coming back into the building…..one can tell the air conditioning is on.

I hate humidity

I hate when it gets above 90 too but the humidity is the worst.

I went to open windows yesterday at home, but as soon as I opened one I felt the humidity pouring in so needless to say I closed it again.

the house is infinitely cooler with no humidity in it.

thank God for ceiling fans too

they work wonders.

I do hope we aren’t going to go straight into summer after we are done with all this rain, but chances are we will

😦

I’m missing the beach

I’m missing the rest and relaxation

I’m missing the sounds of the waves rolling in and out

I am definitely missing the sun…….

The scariest moment is always right before you start…….

a quote by Stephen King.

 

how true……

 

Lately, I have been thinking of my job
I don’t detest it as much as I use to, but my body is complaining with all the physical work of the job
I am not getting any younger
and while I am only 52, with this job some days I feel much older

I actually did not take any pain medicine on my three days off.
I didn’t hurt like I do when I am working and lifting and twisting and turning in my job.

so while I have at least seven if not more years to retire from this job I am thinking of going back to school.

I would love to have the confidence to do this.
But unfortunately I am a chicken and scared spitless to do this.

I know a woman who went back to school at the age of 58 to become a teacher.
she is one of the nicest people I have ever met.
I tell myself if she can do it why can’t I?

Well for one thing I fear I am too dumb.
Another is that confidence thing.
If I went to school I would be almost 57 by the time I was done.
Who would hire a 57-year-old?
Well yes she got a job at sixty…..

I just don’t know
I want to do something different.
but is going to college the answer?
At 52, am I passed that time?

it scares me to take that leap…..

My nephew is looking into moving to Arizona and if things work out at the job he is interested in, he will move there indefinitely

My eldest daughter is moving to Portland next month

My younger sister has moved to Florida and lived 8 years and has now moved back again

I think of the adventure of what they are embarking on

or in my sister’s case, had embarked on

It would be exciting to me to begin a new adventure in another state

Yes it would be scary as well, but exciting too

and while I may very well feel this way because I know it will be something I will never get to do…….I think I would love to begin a new some where.

of course money is always an issue as well as finding a job one likes.
But this hasn’t stopped my eldest child and or my sister from doing it.

My niece and her husband moved to California a good ten years ago.
I doubt she will ever move back to Iowa.
My brother lived in Florida and moved to Canada to be with his new bride.

all adventures in my book.

Yes I am a bit envious…..

 

I so love my grandchildren

I got to see the younger three yesterday and saw Mirielle on Friday and Sunday.

I so love spending time with them.

Kayla is by far the most affectionate.

 I am so incredibly blessed to have all four of them, but Kayla is definitely the most affectionate.
Keira has sort of out grown the need for hugs and kisses

although occasionally she does come sit on my lap for no reason at all.

Aaron is stingy with his affection, although he did give me two kisses and a hug yesterday

and Mirielle has never been overly affectionate.

But Kayla……….my darling Kayla is so incredibly giving.

yesterday morning I caught her looking at me with a smile on her face and I said “What are you looking at me for?” Smiling back

and her response was  “You just make my heart smile Nana”

Oh my God!
It brought tears to my eyes.

I am so very blessed!
thank you Lord for the four of them!
🙂