Archive for November 21, 2010

What hurts the most   1 comment

my estranged eldest daughter texted her father today and asked him to come up to Wisconsin and visit for three or four days and help them with some home repairs on a house they are buying.

I encouraged him to go simply because whatever beef she has with me, doesn’t include him, and I think he should spend time with her if she wants him to.

What hurts the most is, I have no idea what I have said or done to cause this estrangement and she refuses to discuss it with me.
So I am excluded as usual.

Am I feeling sorry for myself?
no not at all.

I have a very clear conscience about our relationship and the last time we were together, everything was fine as far as I knew.

I haven’t been the best mother to her but I am human, and like everyone else I make mistakes too.
Of course she has told me, it isn’t a past mistake that has caused this estrangement.
So I have no idea what I did or didn’t do that makes her want nothing to do with me.

I have accepted it.
Yes it hurts but I am not going to lose sleep over it.
How can I?
I can’t fix something when I don’t have a clue what the problem is.

This is her choice, and obviously she doesn’t need me in her life.

I do hope some day she will change her mind….

I love her very much and miss her.

However I can’t change the way she thinks or feels.

Posted November 21, 2010 by Marge in family, my loves, ramblings